Friday, October 31, 2008

Rodgers Signed Through 2014

Here's the deal, Aaron. We've been watching in you in the Green Room all day, and we're shocked that you haven't been drafted yet. But I, Ted Thompson, want you to know that I'm not only going to take you with the 24th pick of the 2005 draft, but I'm going to make you rich.

You're going to have to earn your money though. We're probably going to keep you on the bench for a good three years, so you can learn our system, and what it takes to be an NFL quarterback, from none other than Brett Favre. Favre's kind of a prima donna, and he's not going to be very receptive to you at first. Just weather the storm, and say the right things. It will be worth it in the long run.

We're going to make the NFC Championship Game following the 2007 season, but Favre will be exposed in that game, because it's going to be very, very cold. Ice Bowl cold. After that however, that's when things are going to get interesting.

Favre will retire. We'll then put our 100 percent support behind you. Favre will try to come back, but we'll trade him to the Jets. Here's where you come in.

All you have to do at that point is stay relatively healthy for seven games. That's it, just seven. We don't even have to be that good, a 4-3 record will suffice. That's all you have to do. Follow these instructions, and we'll extend your contact for another five years, and throw another $57 some million dollars at you. Deal?

Personally, I think this is a fantastic move. Why not sign this guy long term? Clearly he's proven he can compete at a big time NFL level, and he's only going to get better from here.

One of my biggest arguments about getting rid of Brett Favre this offseason was that if we didn't, we were probably going to piss off Rodgers so much that he would leave us. He's train and practice with us for five or six years, and then bug out of town.

Thankfully, douche bag was traded, and Rodgers is our quarterback for a long, long time!


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